Christmas is false happiness of the society 😪🎄

Hello, I hope that anyone who ever read this has had an excellent Christmas, and if you did not have a happy Christmas, you should feel proud Christmas is not a happy time, we should not believe everything we see in movies or series, the kind of scenes where when Christmas arrives, everyone gets together as a family and leave the problems behind and sit down and everything is fine. almost never there is such a family scene there is always something behind but if you are lucky at some point you should have experienced that feeling I experienced but frankly I have forgotten that, the lesson that Christmas is not always happiness I learned a year ago when my aunt I was passing her last Christmas, she was going through the damn cancer, her illness advanced too fast, I regret not having visited her more, I regret not having let her know that I loved her more but above all I regret not having been able to do more so that her last days were the best, repentance is the worst evil for the human soul because it is something that time captures in our minds and souls. I remember that all the members of the family went to their house and they were there that Christmas with her having a great time, as if they knew it was their last family Christmas with her, I did not want to be part of it, I considered my aunt to be a fighter and she would not give up but three months later she died, I think it is the saddest chapter of life, they are things that you will never heal, she had a lot to offer to life, to the life of her family and now that It is no longer there, it starts every piece of my heart. That was one of the saddest Christmases to see and be with a person you love in a bad state, with tubes in your body, unable to move, it just makes me think that life was never fair for anyone. That Christmas I remember that nobody ate anything, everyone was just beside her talking and sharing the last sighs of life she had left, that's why I think Christmas is the false happiness of society, she deserved all that and But I did not need a time to show her the love and affection I had for her, however my family did everything they could to make her have a better time, I miss her so much, I know she is better but it is really difficult to live without she continued at our side.

my Christmas was disgusting not only because I remembered her, but also because of my depression, it is really difficult as a depression to adapt to the feeling of happiness, I think I perceive Christmas as a false happiness, one that you can not feel because it's not real, it's a false illusion, it's not like when you celebrate your friend's birthday because obviously you feel that happiness or like when you see your boyfriend or girlfriend, you can not compare it but you can not feel it either, and it's a pity that you are judged by not feel a genuine feeling, but what saddens me most is knowing that next Christmas will be like this without feeling that false or momentary happiness because once you see that depression takes hold of a date in your life you never feel again of the same way.

I hope that with time I can improve and move forward without any guilt and finally I share a great song is a cover of Pink Floyd "wish you were here" by Sparklehorse and Radiohead, well with nothing more to say I say goodbye and I hope that if you feel bad for not celebrating Christmas, do not worry there are more like you, and it is also normal not to celebrate Christmas. We read soon.